On February 18, 2010, Dave led a discussion of Chapters 4-6 of The Happiness Hypothesis by Jonathan Haidt. The group consensus was that these three chapters were the meat of the book so far, but particularly Chapter 5. If a person were to just pick out one chapter to read in this book, Chapter 5 would be it. But first let's summarize Chapter 4.
Chapter 4 The Faults of Others. Haidt presented a number of scientific studies that basicly demonstrate that we are all very biased regarding our own faults. We complain about the "speck in our neighbor's eye, but don't see the log in our own." Studies show that no matter how attempts are made to point out someone's bias, that person does not change. He/she is very good at re-spinning that criticism or making excuses; he/she has an internal lawyer providing that service at all times. The only study that showed some improvement was when subjects of the experiment were asked to write out a critique considering the weak points of their side of a case debate. But this was a hypothetical case and not a critique of the person's character itself. So we see things through a rose-colored mirror when we try to look closely at ourselves.
Haidt recognizes that the problem of evil has bedeviled many religions since their birth. "If God is all good and all powerful, either he allows evil to flourish (which means he is not all good), or else he struggles against evil (which means he is not all powerful). Religions have tried to solve this conundrum in various ways but none are very satisfactory. One religion portrays good and evil forever in battle with humans caught in the middle. Another religious way says that the world is the way it should be and there is no evil, in fact the world as we know it is an illusion. Therefore "evil" occurances are not important in the whole scheme of things. It turns out that when we truly look at what is regarded as pure evil, it is much more complicated. Sometimes the victim has participated and started some of the "evil occurances." Sometimes so called evil is the result of other attributes such as greed/ambition; more commonly it is due to someone's unrealistically or even narcissistically high level of self-esteem. The latter is particularly true in individual occurances of violence or cruelty. But to really get a mass atrocity going, the required ingredient seems to be idealism, especially where it involves the belief that the ends justify the means. "The inner lawyer, the rose-colored mirror, naive realism, and the myth of pure evil -- these mechanisms all conspire to weave for us a web of significance upon which angels and demons flight it out. Our ever-judging minds then give us constant flashes of approval and disapproval, along with the certainty that we are on the side of the angels."
So what can we do about this? We know now that judgementalism leads to anger, torment and conflict. The elephant has very strong likes and dislikes and acts automatically on those feelings. We must learn to tame the elephant -- meditation and cognitive therapy both work. We can learn to become calmer, less reactive to the petty manipulations and biases of life. We can slowly teach ourselves equanimity; seeing the log in our own eye, we can become less biased, less moralistic, and therefore less inclined to argument and conflict.
The Pursuit of Happiness: This Chapter 5 has a lot of meat in it. Let's consider it.
What makes us happy and for how long? We can divide "happy" feelings into two types. The first can be called pleasures. These might include ice cream, chocolate cake, a shopping spree, sex. All of these pleasures produce a swift shot of dopamine in the brain which provides a sense of happiness but it will only last a short time. Our brain chemistry is such that we very easily adjust to that level of dopamine and then the old pleasures don't produce that "happiness" jolt anymore. We need something more -- more ice cream, something more expensive. We will always be wanting more, we run and run to get more, like hamsters on a wheel. The human mind is very sensitive to such sudden changes in condition, but is not very sensitive to the absolute levels of pleasure. So after a time, the happiness is gone and we are at our baseline of functioning again, which is your emotional setpoint and is determined by genes. This is the adaptation principle at work. To avoid adaptation, our pleasures need to be savored and varied and probably somewhat infrequent.
It also turns out that in this striving to achieve a pleasure many times what becomes most important is not the end result itself, but the process of getting there. We get gratification from that process.
The other type of happiness we just touched upon is called gratification. This comes from accomplishing something, learning something, or improving something. When we are progressing through the gratification process we are achieving something called flow. Flow occurs when the challenges of the process exactly match your abilities to proceed. You are not underchallenged where everything is too easy and therefore boring and you are not overchallenged so that you become frustrated. You can read any of several books by Mihalyi Czikscentmihalyi written about how flow produces happiness. It also turns out that more gratification occurs and longer lasting improvements in mood occur from kindness and gratitude activites than from those in which the person indulged just themselves.
This chapter contains the happiness hypothesis:
H = S + C + V
H is of course Happiness. S stands for our emotional setpoint. We have already learned that that is mostly genetic though we can alter it somewhat using meditation, cognitive behavioral therapy and in some cases where necessary medication.
C stands for the external conditions of your life eg. location of birth, economic status, living conditions, race, gender, disability, marital status. Most of these conditions do not significantly affect the happiness level. But there are a few which studies have shown are worth striving for because improvement in those areas will provide a slight boost to the happiness sum of life. These are: noise level, length of work commute, lack of control particularly in the workplace, shame (such as over a person's appearance), and relationships. The latter are especially important in life. Good relationships make people happy and happy people enjoy more and better relationships than unhappy people. Also you never adjust to interpersonal conflict; it does repeated damage to the happiness sum.
Todd brought up that practicing tonglen is an activity that can help with interpersonal conflict, as well as suffering in general. Tonglen is Tibetan for 'giving and taking' and it refers to a meditation practice found in Tibetan Buddhism. In the practice, one visualizes taking onto oneself the suffereing of others usually done while breathing in. Then on breathing out, one visualizes giving one's own happiness and success to others. One can do this while considering just the suffering of an individual, or a group or mankind in general. This meditative practice reduces selfish attachment, creates positive karma by giving and helping (which by the way increases gratification and the H sum), and develops loving kindness, a strong Buddhist goal.
V stands for voluntary things that you can do to improve your happiness. Here is where flow in your workplace and in your leisure activitiees comes in. And here also one can choose to do activities that express kindness and gratitude and these have been shown to increase the happiness sum.
Dr. Haidt questions whether the severity and austerity of traditional Buddhism and other eastern religions is indicated in today's world. Most people are more satisfied with their lives than dissatisfied. Even people living in poverty in the world do lead meaningful lives. Many have strong support groups and they capitalize on the non-material resources available to them and find satisfaction in their lives. However, we know that Buddhism never meant to cut off relationships as part of our attachments. Instead it means to cut off many of the modern dependencies on the world as we know it today as that world is impermanent. Buddha is history's most perceptive guide to the need for internal work for happiness to increase. But we need guidance from modern psychology about what we can strive for under the V part of equation to help our happiness sum.
Todd emphasized that three things are necessary for the most happiness: they are relationships, flow in your work and life, and divinity. Now divinity is not necessarily a God, but can be a connnection to nature or beauty for example. I would class it more as a sanctity -- a feeling that there is something outside of ourself which produces a powerful sensation which we can utilize and have faith in.
Chapter 6: Love and Attachments.
We did not have time to discuss this chapter too much. So the summary here will be brief.
Dr Haidt spends the first portion of this chapter discussing Harlow's work with monkeys carried out at the University of Wisconsin. This work disproved the old idea that children only needed nourishment and protection from germs and illness, that holding them would spoil them. Indeed, monkeys and children need human contact, holding, cuddling and evidence of love daily, really all of the time, in order to become well adjusted and trusting adults. Two ancient and interlocking systems have evolved in us to provide these kind of nurturing basics for children: an attachment system that bonds child to mother and a caregiving system that bonds mother to child.
Evolutionally speaking, our complicated social interactions have required our large brain. But in order to have this large brain and be born through the birth canal, young humans have to be born before the brain is totally developed. Therefore human babies are totally helpless. This means that the mother must provide complete care for several years and guidance for at least another decade. The mother is unable to provide this degree of intense care and also provide food and shelter for herself and her children. Therefore, she needs the help of the human male. Evolution has helped us out with brain chemicals that provide love and attraction between mother and father to hold the man to his mate until the children are raised and able to provide for themselves.
The love that initially draws man and woman together is chemically produced by dopamine and other chemicals in the brain. It tends to be very intense in order to form a tight bond between man and woman, but it only lasts about 6 months. In the ideal situation this intense romantic love is replaced by a companianate love that is much less intense but very long lasting, maybe 60 years. The area under the curve is much greater in companianate love than in romantic love. I am afraid our society has still not entirely figured these facts out. Hence our matings often do not last for that 60 years or so. Expectations are that the intense romantic love will last and due to its chemical nature, that is impossible. Hence all of our split families.
There is also the love that exists between friends and relatives. Having strong social relationships strengthens the immune system, extends life (more than does quitting smoking), speeds recovery from surgery, and reduces risks of anxiety and depressive illnesses. Not just extroverts are naturally happier and healthier. Introverts that are pulled screaming and kicking into the social milieau enjoy it and find that the social occasion boosts their mood. Recent work on giving support shows that caring for others is often more beneficial than is receiving help. We are an ultrasocial species, full of emotions finely tuned for loving, befriending, helping, sharing, and otherwise intertwining our lives with others.
Next week Sharleen will guide us through Chapters 7 - 10.
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